Today has been a mixed bag of highs and lows and little tid bits along the way.
Tuesday/Thursday I have two classes and a self defense class so I have this mismash of things I have to carry with me. Books, notebooks, clothes, deodorant, flash cards, etc.....
I am in the very bad habit of carrying everything I need for every class in my backpack no matter what day I have the class on. My thinking is that if I have a free moment or finish something early I can just go right to the next thing- right? No matter that this is a rare occurrence-in my mind, since I has happened before it will invariably happen again. And let me tell you there is no worse feeling (ok, yes there is...) than thinking,"Oh, I can totally work on ________ while I wait!" and when you reach for the folder it isn't there. Wasted time, tsk, tsk.
So anyway, since my backpack this semester has 5 books, 1 binder, 5 folders, 4 spiral notebooks, a dictionary, flash drive, earbuds, hand sanitizer, calculator, and a pencil pack full of various writing utensils, a small stapler, staples, paper clips, post it notes, etc......... it is heavy.
I (and my back) decided that on Tuesday/Thursday I need a break and so will only carry the books I need for that day's classes and clothes for self defense. You have no idea how much inner turmoil this decision caused me. But I reasoned with myself and decided it was for the best. No more carrying around a 100 pound backpack, purse, and a bag of clothes and toiletries for self defense.
I woke up and pulled out one bag. I placed 2 books, 2 folders, 2 spiral notebooks, and 1 binder in it for my "real" classes today. I then remembered I needed my flashcards- tossed those in. Then packed my karate pants, a shirt, a towel, my toiletry bag, and flash drive. Determined not to use a second bag I crammed my purse full of my lunch and made sure to grab the umbrella on my way out.
I felt victorious. The bag was heavy but not as heavy as my normal load plus the bag. Victory! I managed to get out on time and made it to class without having to rush. I smugly pulled out my binder, book, flashcards.......and that is when I realized I didn't pack ANYTHING from my pencil pouch! Not one stinking pen, pencil, highlighter, color pencil....nothing had made it to my bag.
I scrambled and found a pen that I keep in my purse as a "purse pen" (yeah, I'm psycho....) and saved the day. Went through my Spanish class and not only avoided strangling the most annoying person in the world but also got some extra credit due to the exactness of my work. I was the only person who had read and then followed (to the "T", I might add) the directions for our homework assignments- imagine that. Someone named Amanda is a little overachiever.
Went to the lab and finished up a homework assignment from my flash drive and headed off into academic victory fueled bliss to the locker room. I set up my locker, changed clothes and went off to roll on the ground and practice kicking ass.
I learned how to break a guard, avoid being dragged to another location and how to be a bad ass in general. Went to the locker room, showered and changed clothes. I was looking good time wise and was looking forward to a nice quick lunch before my last class. Packed my bags and went to brush my hair and realized that I didn't have one. Argh. FML. No pens first and now this? Two essential items that were completely neglected! Who am I and where the fuck is my second bag!? This would have never happened if I had had my second bag!
I really didn't have a choice on what to do. So I put my freshly washed hair up in my sweaty scrunchie from self defense and headed out looking like a freak. Crammed my lunch together and ate (because in my panic over my brush I fell into a time-space crag and spent way longer than I anticipated in the locker room) quickly.
When class was over I ran out into the rain and fought my way home looking like a clown with disgusting hair and dark circles under my eyes due to lack of sleep.
I made it home at 3........did two loads of laundry, took the trash out, cleaned up, cooked dinner, and spent roughly 15 minutes of quality time with hubby before rushing out again to study hall. And this time- I BROUGHT BOTH BAGS!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Frosty Warmth
Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark, and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
-Robert Frost
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark, and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
-Robert Frost
Feel Better Ya'll!
I started this blog but then realized I don't have anything positive to say.
To help myself remember the positive things I will make a list of my favorite things.
lists (Yeah, I like lists. they make everything alright.)
cats (I like substituting "meow" for lyrics when I sing to the cat.)
dogs (Oh man, I can't wait till I can get a dog-baby. I'm gonna luv it-n-pet it-n-kiss-it.)
birds (I always say hi to the birds on campus. They just hop away.)
books (I want a kindle but don't. I want pages. I want the book smell. Ah, books.)
coffee (I am going to build a Starbucks into my mansion when it is completed.)
people (Eh, not so much. BUT I do enjoy children-when they are well-behaved- so maybe nevermind.)
chopin, dickinson, bronte, poe, sexton, carver, angelou, hemingway, etc (such good medicine for the soul.)
To help myself remember the positive things I will make a list of my favorite things.
lists (Yeah, I like lists. they make everything alright.)
cats (I like substituting "meow" for lyrics when I sing to the cat.)
dogs (Oh man, I can't wait till I can get a dog-baby. I'm gonna luv it-n-pet it-n-kiss-it.)
birds (I always say hi to the birds on campus. They just hop away.)
books (I want a kindle but don't. I want pages. I want the book smell. Ah, books.)
coffee (I am going to build a Starbucks into my mansion when it is completed.)
people (Eh, not so much. BUT I do enjoy children-when they are well-behaved- so maybe nevermind.)
chopin, dickinson, bronte, poe, sexton, carver, angelou, hemingway, etc (such good medicine for the soul.)
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Snow, Bitches, and School
Tonight and Monday we are supposed to get snow. I think it is going to be a Snowmageddon!
The Colts are out and that sucks but I donned my most favorite trusty blue hoodie (thanks KK and angel hips!) today to show my support for my team. We did great especially with all the injuries we had. I think #10 should be run out on rails and never heard from again. Granted that one play shouldn't have cost them the game BUT........... argh.
I was supposed to go see The Birth of Impressionism on this past Friday but made the fatal mistake of checking the mail before we were supposed to leave. We got a letter that threw our theory that 2011 was going to be so much better out the window. A letter that infuriated me so that it ruined my evening. No Frist Center for me. That event was rescheduled to 01/14/2011.
We got a letter from the TX state Attorney General office stating that Hubby was behind in paying child support by the tune of $1086.08. Color us surprised since his child support is payroll deducted and has been since August of 2006. When I called the lovely people at the Attorney General's office to explain this to them I was told that it is Hubby's responsibility to make sure the payments got to them and that there were "too many times to count" when he was in arrearage and that if she were to give me the specifics that the call "would never end" and that she would gladly send me a list of transactions and I needed to compare them and get back with her. In the meantime the state has already taken actions with his employer to have this arrearage situation fixed by pulling more from his check- effective immediately. When asked why we weren't notified sooner....perhaps after the first time they didn't get any money or the full amount I was told that the "system isn't designed that way" and that it is up to either the custodial or non-custodial parent to let the state know if the amounts weren't being received. So, naturally, my next question was: "So, you're telling me that SHE said she wasn't getting the money?" and the response I got was "No. That isn't at all what I said." So, if the state is some uninvolved 3rd party who doesn't have any record of if/when/how much was received and they don't have a system that can catch late or missing payments and it is up to the NCP or the CP to tell them if there is a problem and WE didn't know so we didn't call.......who else is left to report a problem? By the process of elimination it has to be her.
This upsets me greatly because this reaffirms the fact that all she has to do is cry wolf and the state runs to her aid and we are presumably guilty until we prove otherwise. In the beginning of this crazy mess she did this, too. She went to the state in 2006 and claimed that Hubby hadn't paid her for the first 2 years they were divorced. They opened up a child support case and send a letter to garnish his wages for this past due support. She failed to mention that she had done this and we were blindsided by a nice letter from the Attorney General. We went to mediation and pulled 6 years of cancelled checks, bank records, etc that proved not only had he paid her from day one as per the divorce decree he had in fact, OVERPAID her voluntarily. To the tune of $5,000. This was then considered a "gift" and the child support was set to up come out automatically.
Now, apparently, she has gone back to the state and said she was underpaid/not paid on "several occasions" since 2006. But not once did she mention this to us. So, yet again, we are forced to prove that we are doing everything we are supposed to do. I pulled 4 years of pay stubs and found 3 total occasions in which she didn't get the full amount she was supposed to. She is supposed to get $287.65 every paycheck. On three occasions between May 2010-Aug 2010 she only got $203.88. Leaving us a total of $240.00 behind. Far less than this $1086.08 that the state has come up with. Oh, and let me mention some interesting facts about those three occasions.
Hubby got sick on May 2, 2010 and did not return to work until September 6, 2010. He was out on STD that entire time. All 3 occasions occurred during that time. All 3 occasions that she received $203.88 the total amount of the check that was deposited into our account to live on was $104.80. She received almost DOUBLE the amount we got to live on for 2 weeks in child support. But I'm sure this does nothing but vindicate her story in the eyes of the state and Hubby is confirmed as a deadbeat. I don't begrudge giving her the damn $240.00 but what I do not appreciate is the lackluster attitude of the state of TX and being harassed by a woman that has time and time again been proven to be a liar -via the state.
Tomorrow I am due to be at the employer so we can get an affidavit and documents together to prove that payments were made and try and get this straightened out and make sure she gets her $240.00. The youngest is 13 and I hope that this doesn't happen again because I am already on very thin ice with my patience towards her. I have had to restrain myself from calling, texting, or emailing her because I do value my relationship with the kids. I can not wait until the youngest turns 18.....I'll be on the news that day. Count on it.
In happier news, school starts Thursday and I am excited and nervous. This is going to be a tough semester but I will be glad to have something that keeps me out of the smokebox and occupied mentally. I am not looking forward to buying the books but such is life.
It seems I might have been on some people's NY resolution lists and that is disappointing but perhaps it is time for a whole new chapter?
The Colts are out and that sucks but I donned my most favorite trusty blue hoodie (thanks KK and angel hips!) today to show my support for my team. We did great especially with all the injuries we had. I think #10 should be run out on rails and never heard from again. Granted that one play shouldn't have cost them the game BUT........... argh.
I was supposed to go see The Birth of Impressionism on this past Friday but made the fatal mistake of checking the mail before we were supposed to leave. We got a letter that threw our theory that 2011 was going to be so much better out the window. A letter that infuriated me so that it ruined my evening. No Frist Center for me. That event was rescheduled to 01/14/2011.
We got a letter from the TX state Attorney General office stating that Hubby was behind in paying child support by the tune of $1086.08. Color us surprised since his child support is payroll deducted and has been since August of 2006. When I called the lovely people at the Attorney General's office to explain this to them I was told that it is Hubby's responsibility to make sure the payments got to them and that there were "too many times to count" when he was in arrearage and that if she were to give me the specifics that the call "would never end" and that she would gladly send me a list of transactions and I needed to compare them and get back with her. In the meantime the state has already taken actions with his employer to have this arrearage situation fixed by pulling more from his check- effective immediately. When asked why we weren't notified sooner....perhaps after the first time they didn't get any money or the full amount I was told that the "system isn't designed that way" and that it is up to either the custodial or non-custodial parent to let the state know if the amounts weren't being received. So, naturally, my next question was: "So, you're telling me that SHE said she wasn't getting the money?" and the response I got was "No. That isn't at all what I said." So, if the state is some uninvolved 3rd party who doesn't have any record of if/when/how much was received and they don't have a system that can catch late or missing payments and it is up to the NCP or the CP to tell them if there is a problem and WE didn't know so we didn't call.......who else is left to report a problem? By the process of elimination it has to be her.
This upsets me greatly because this reaffirms the fact that all she has to do is cry wolf and the state runs to her aid and we are presumably guilty until we prove otherwise. In the beginning of this crazy mess she did this, too. She went to the state in 2006 and claimed that Hubby hadn't paid her for the first 2 years they were divorced. They opened up a child support case and send a letter to garnish his wages for this past due support. She failed to mention that she had done this and we were blindsided by a nice letter from the Attorney General. We went to mediation and pulled 6 years of cancelled checks, bank records, etc that proved not only had he paid her from day one as per the divorce decree he had in fact, OVERPAID her voluntarily. To the tune of $5,000. This was then considered a "gift" and the child support was set to up come out automatically.
Now, apparently, she has gone back to the state and said she was underpaid/not paid on "several occasions" since 2006. But not once did she mention this to us. So, yet again, we are forced to prove that we are doing everything we are supposed to do. I pulled 4 years of pay stubs and found 3 total occasions in which she didn't get the full amount she was supposed to. She is supposed to get $287.65 every paycheck. On three occasions between May 2010-Aug 2010 she only got $203.88. Leaving us a total of $240.00 behind. Far less than this $1086.08 that the state has come up with. Oh, and let me mention some interesting facts about those three occasions.
Hubby got sick on May 2, 2010 and did not return to work until September 6, 2010. He was out on STD that entire time. All 3 occasions occurred during that time. All 3 occasions that she received $203.88 the total amount of the check that was deposited into our account to live on was $104.80. She received almost DOUBLE the amount we got to live on for 2 weeks in child support. But I'm sure this does nothing but vindicate her story in the eyes of the state and Hubby is confirmed as a deadbeat. I don't begrudge giving her the damn $240.00 but what I do not appreciate is the lackluster attitude of the state of TX and being harassed by a woman that has time and time again been proven to be a liar -via the state.
Tomorrow I am due to be at the employer so we can get an affidavit and documents together to prove that payments were made and try and get this straightened out and make sure she gets her $240.00. The youngest is 13 and I hope that this doesn't happen again because I am already on very thin ice with my patience towards her. I have had to restrain myself from calling, texting, or emailing her because I do value my relationship with the kids. I can not wait until the youngest turns 18.....I'll be on the news that day. Count on it.
In happier news, school starts Thursday and I am excited and nervous. This is going to be a tough semester but I will be glad to have something that keeps me out of the smokebox and occupied mentally. I am not looking forward to buying the books but such is life.
It seems I might have been on some people's NY resolution lists and that is disappointing but perhaps it is time for a whole new chapter?
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Anne Sexton
Anne Sexton visits me in my dreams.
And in the night, into my marrow, sorrow, she weaves.
Silently she slips bitter truths in my pockets.
They anchor me to the shoreline; heavy rugged barbs.
And I am helpless against the rising tide.
I am the Unknown Girl’s sin.
Cast off and drowning far from her shore.
My only inheritance is a pendulum soul.
And in the night, into my marrow, sorrow, she weaves.
Silently she slips bitter truths in my pockets.
They anchor me to the shoreline; heavy rugged barbs.
And I am helpless against the rising tide.
I am the Unknown Girl’s sin.
Cast off and drowning far from her shore.
My only inheritance is a pendulum soul.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Bye, Bye 2010
2010 is almost over, people!
I am very excited about this.
2010 wasn't/hasn't been a great year for us and so to see it amble off into the sunset will be a joy.
In the spring we had crazy, freaky snow that delayed classes and all that jazz. But it was a good semester-I ended up with 6 "A"s. Then it was tornadoes, then rain, then the seizure and flood combo. And it was right about that time that I fell into the rabbit hole.
The summer was OK. Constant Dr.'s visits, physical therapy, crazy work hours/schedule with the Census. The kids visit was fun as always and definitely livened up the apartment.
Autumn we had to make some hard decisions (decisions that I am having a harder time dealing with that I thought I would) and I started school again. It was going to be a challenging semester and I kinda gave myself an out. I dropped one of my hardest classes to make sure I passed my math class. So, instead of 7 classes I only had 6. Which resulted in 5 "A"s and 1 "C". The "C" was in my yoga class and was due to missing 2 classes. Yeah, you heard me, 2. I got bronchitis around midterm and had an on campus doctor note and everything but apparently in activity classes there are no "excused" absences. I thought about fighting it but decided to move on. I still made Dean's List and got a 3.85 for the semester. And the best part is I not only passed, but aced, the one and only math class I have to take. Yay for no more math!
Thus far winter has been really annoying. I enjoy the snow very much but since school is out I am locked in a smoky cage with a troll for very long days. The holidays were alright. I tried to make Thanksgiving special and don't think my effort was noticed. I really thought long and hard about gifts for people this year- partially because of money and partially because I really love tailoring gifts for people. Again, I don't think my efforts were really noticed. I honestly felt like when the troll opened her gifts that if it had been a six pack or a bong and she would have loved it more. And that saddens me.
Now, we are so close to the end of the year. I survived though I am not sure how long it will take me to heal.
I want to be better than I am, than I am expected to be, and be better in spite of the chaos around me. I think 2011 will be better and I think I am moving closer to my goals- just not as quickly as I'd like.
Tomorrow night I am making a special meal and for afterwards we've got hickory farms treats, chocolate covered strawberries, Arrington's 2010 Blackberry wine, Skyy lemon vodka, and Martini & Rossi's Asti and some cheapo poppers and noise makers. We are going to kiss 2010 goodbye in a blur of good food, alcohol, and dancing in the kitchen.
Starting January 3, 2011 I am going back on the part-time job hunt. I will still be a tutor on campus for the soccer team but am looking for something else to haul in some extra cash. My gift to myself for completing this goal will be a dog-baby. I am super excited about this prospect and think it would be great for me.
So, here's to 2011. More school, less doctor's visits, a dog-baby, and happiness- fingers crossed!
I am very excited about this.
2010 wasn't/hasn't been a great year for us and so to see it amble off into the sunset will be a joy.
In the spring we had crazy, freaky snow that delayed classes and all that jazz. But it was a good semester-I ended up with 6 "A"s. Then it was tornadoes, then rain, then the seizure and flood combo. And it was right about that time that I fell into the rabbit hole.
The summer was OK. Constant Dr.'s visits, physical therapy, crazy work hours/schedule with the Census. The kids visit was fun as always and definitely livened up the apartment.
Autumn we had to make some hard decisions (decisions that I am having a harder time dealing with that I thought I would) and I started school again. It was going to be a challenging semester and I kinda gave myself an out. I dropped one of my hardest classes to make sure I passed my math class. So, instead of 7 classes I only had 6. Which resulted in 5 "A"s and 1 "C". The "C" was in my yoga class and was due to missing 2 classes. Yeah, you heard me, 2. I got bronchitis around midterm and had an on campus doctor note and everything but apparently in activity classes there are no "excused" absences. I thought about fighting it but decided to move on. I still made Dean's List and got a 3.85 for the semester. And the best part is I not only passed, but aced, the one and only math class I have to take. Yay for no more math!
Thus far winter has been really annoying. I enjoy the snow very much but since school is out I am locked in a smoky cage with a troll for very long days. The holidays were alright. I tried to make Thanksgiving special and don't think my effort was noticed. I really thought long and hard about gifts for people this year- partially because of money and partially because I really love tailoring gifts for people. Again, I don't think my efforts were really noticed. I honestly felt like when the troll opened her gifts that if it had been a six pack or a bong and she would have loved it more. And that saddens me.
Now, we are so close to the end of the year. I survived though I am not sure how long it will take me to heal.
I want to be better than I am, than I am expected to be, and be better in spite of the chaos around me. I think 2011 will be better and I think I am moving closer to my goals- just not as quickly as I'd like.
Tomorrow night I am making a special meal and for afterwards we've got hickory farms treats, chocolate covered strawberries, Arrington's 2010 Blackberry wine, Skyy lemon vodka, and Martini & Rossi's Asti and some cheapo poppers and noise makers. We are going to kiss 2010 goodbye in a blur of good food, alcohol, and dancing in the kitchen.
Starting January 3, 2011 I am going back on the part-time job hunt. I will still be a tutor on campus for the soccer team but am looking for something else to haul in some extra cash. My gift to myself for completing this goal will be a dog-baby. I am super excited about this prospect and think it would be great for me.
So, here's to 2011. More school, less doctor's visits, a dog-baby, and happiness- fingers crossed!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Amanda's Event Wish List
1. Attend the Nashville Symphony: Almost checked off the list! Got the tickets during the Thanksgiving sale. Going 2/17/2010.
2. Go see the Impressionism Exhibit at the Frist: I swear I will get to this exhibit. Thank God it is here through Jan 23.
3. See Taylor Swift in Louisville in July (with Dwayne and Kalli- as Kalli's birthday present): I am stalking the website like I did last time. No sale date yet. We loved Louisville and those tickets will be mine....and Kalli's...yeah, it's all for the girl, totally.
4. See Lady Gaga in concert: This should be listed on a big-freaking-chance-never-happen list. Tickets went fast and are being resold at majorly inflated prices. Prices that I can't justify. Maybe one day.
5. See Les Miserables in production: This could be happening after the in-laws gift us with Christmas money. SFAM taking me to the one-night-only event just fanned the flames. Surprisingly, Dwayne wants to go with me. That is a pleasant surprise and doubles the chances it will happen. Yay!
2. Go see the Impressionism Exhibit at the Frist: I swear I will get to this exhibit. Thank God it is here through Jan 23.
3. See Taylor Swift in Louisville in July (with Dwayne and Kalli- as Kalli's birthday present): I am stalking the website like I did last time. No sale date yet. We loved Louisville and those tickets will be mine....and Kalli's...yeah, it's all for the girl, totally.
4. See Lady Gaga in concert: This should be listed on a big-freaking-chance-never-happen list. Tickets went fast and are being resold at majorly inflated prices. Prices that I can't justify. Maybe one day.
5. See Les Miserables in production: This could be happening after the in-laws gift us with Christmas money. SFAM taking me to the one-night-only event just fanned the flames. Surprisingly, Dwayne wants to go with me. That is a pleasant surprise and doubles the chances it will happen. Yay!
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