Bleh? Nay! Meh.

Working... panicked calls from my supervisor's supervisor....then 10 minutes later everything is cool....at least until the next panicked call. I am fluid, I am fluid.

Doctor's Offices..... seen a lot of them lately. Dwayne had a follow up today, needs an MRI on his back, and 8 more physical therapy visits. Co-pays are flying out of my account and EOBs are flooding my mailbox.

Family Crisis..... My sister-in-law was up for a visit this past weekend and ended up at StoneCrest with heat exhaustion. 3 days in the hospital with no definitive answer and a very mean nurse.

Cooking...my cooking has slowed down due to lack of prep time but also because of the disappointment of the meals I did manage to cook. "Tangy Fish Tacos" sounds very yummy but the reality wasn't. And the delicious (I thought) chicken potato skillet meal wasn't well received because it was "dark" meat. I need regroup and go back to some basic meals that I know are great and tweak them where I can.

Kids..... the first one lands 36 hours from now. Searching for and being extremely creative with free yet fun activities.

Tired....enough said.

A desire for sausage and more beefy goodness!

Feast your eyes ladies and gents! I made this. ME. I made a freaking roast beef!

Let me explain as I clear the tears from my eyes what an accomplishment this is for me.

I saw this on Cook's Country (NPT on Saturday mornings) and it looked so amazing that I had to try it. The episode was classic roast beef and gravy....... I drooled so much during that show that I had to do it.

So, I took notes and signed up online for access to their recipes and set out looking for the perfect piece of meat for my roast beef.

I found the closest thing I could to the beef I needed and could afford (top sirloin was recommended but is like a gagillion dollars a pound- so I opted for a sirloin shoulder roast- who knew such a thing even existed?) and followed the directions.

I followed the directions, people- do you hear me?!?! All of them- even the ones that I don't normally follow cuz I feel like they are dumb- because I am much smarter than any damn professional t.v. chef.

So, I took my raw meat, patted it dry and then tenderly rubbed in 2 tsp of salt all over. ( #1 I have never before rubbed raw meat with anything and quite frankly find it disgusting.)

Then I had to let the meat marinade for 12-24 hours. (#2 any recipe that involves me having to wait for any crazy amount of time like um say, over 5 minutes, really annoys me- I'm trying to make this food now- not next week!)

Then today I turned up my Paula Deen skillet, dribbled in olive oil and waited for smoke. Then braised the meat on all sides. (#3 another dirty dish for 8 minutes of cooking.... ugh. perhaps this wasn't a good idea.)

Finally, I took my little braised meat and put in on a rack at 275 for 1.5-2.0 hours. (#4 i cooked it the full 2 hours because i didn't want mine to be as pink as Cook's Country showed)

When the oven opened I was disappointed because mine didn't look as beautiful as theirs but I stayed on track and let the meat rest for 30 min under tin foil. (#5 more waiting- yeash!)

I had no idea what the hell "cutting against the grain of the meat" meant so I just picked a point and went at it.........

AMAZING, PEOPLE, AMAZING!

So good.....and I made it.

Had to share.

And in other, non beef related, news..........

I didn't realize that I hadn't given an update on Dwayne since I talked to KB today.

Dwayne is doing much better but is still not 100% or back to work.

During the seizure he injured his back and now can't walk or sit too long without back pain.

So, he is starting physical therapy tomorrow to help heal/strengthen his back to get him back to normal.

He has also been officially diagnosed with severe obstructive sleep apnea. (I told him so!)

Apparently, he stopped breathing 33 times and hour in his sleep study.

So, we went back for another and tested out a CPAP machine and are picking it up tomorrow.

They are pretty sure that is the root cause of all of this because not breathing for 33 minutes out of an hour causes your brain to wake up and send signals to your throat to relax which keeps it active all night which means no rest/restorative energy which leads to all kinds of bad things.

He is on blood pressure meds and a low salt diet and is enjoying having all 3 meals cooked and delivered to him on his couch. I have purchased 3 different low salt, low fat, light, etc cookbooks and have been trying to completely eliminate some things and adjust others.

He has been doing extremely well on his diet and has lost almost 8 pounds so far just with diet. The Dr. thinks that when he is able to walk for longer periods of time it will just fly off.

He does miss sausage though....in fact he told me just yesterday that he has a "desire for sausage" which caught me off guard but that is the man I love.

We have been working, going to appointments, calling about benefits, arranging camps for the kids, booking tickets, etc..... and things seem to be back on track.

Busy as always but things are returning to normal.

More later.......

News and No News

A couple of definitions to begin:

Things I wanted to tell everyone and might have, or forgotten to tell, or forgotten I told= News

Things that are pending, awaiting a follow up, etc. = No News

Ok....here we go.

Background Info for News:

Dwayne had a seizure on May 2.
Before that our 15 month old computer died.
Before that I got a summer job working for the Census doing payroll and junk.
And even before all of that I was going to school full-time.

News!

Dwayne got out of the hospital on May 4th. Has had a follow up EEG and sleep study. Good news- no brain tumor. Has been resting and getting better every day. Memory loss has faded and he is almost back to normal. So normal in fact that we have argued (well, really, me yelling at him) because I think he is doing too much too fast. We have a follow up visit with the neurologist and a dentist appointment this Thursday. Then go back to his new PCP on the 27th. So far, so good.

I called Dell and placed a ticket in to fix our computer. Surprisingly, this Dell experience was amazing. They were very nice and said they'd have someone come and fix it. I guess it was the fact that I was still under warranty? Anyway, the guy came out, fixed it up, yay. It is alive again. I managed to get most of our stuff (including 2200 songs- thank god!) off of our external hard drive. I haven't tackled itunes or loading the printer stuff yet- that is another battle for another day.

Still working at the Census. It is kind of crazy because some days I'll go in and it will be all hands on deck and then they will say no overtime. They will call me in early and I will go and sit and wait with nothing to do. But I will not complain because they have been extremely helpful and flexible when dealing with Dwayne being sick, the crazy weather, and me being sick for about 3 days recently. I am grateful and it is enjoyable work.

School finally ended and not a moment too soon. The flooding caused finals to be canceled and rescheduled and Dwayne's hospital stay caused me to miss one completely. But I talked to all the professors and got everyone squared away and it is over and grades are out. I got "A"s in all my classes and made the Dean's List! My rusty old GPA is now a 3.48. I hope to celebrate one day when things calm down. Probably sometime in July after we move from this medical hurricane to the kids hurricane.

Flooding. Yeah. That was insane. KB had some crazy flooding but other than that I don't think I know anyone who was directly hit...so yay. I am glad everyone came out unscathed- for the most part. That was super crazy but I will say this is a moment where I am actually proud of Nashville and the Volunteer state for rising to the call of people in need. I am sad that Serpas is leaving- I liked him.

Kids. Got the dates and flights nailed down early this year. June 19 the first one will land. Then on June 24th the second, and finally all 3 will be here June 28. They will all return to TX on July 10th. Not sure how much vacation time Dwayne will have left when they get here but we will make it work.

No News!

Dwayne had an EEG what feels like forever ago- no call, no nothing. So, that is good right?

We still don't have a release/return to work date for him yet....might get one this Thursday.

That is all I can really remember right now.... I hope everyone is well and I'm sorry I haven't been in touch. I will do my best to do better when things get settled again. Thanks to everyone for the texting and checking in and help- it means a lot to me and is keeping me sane. Again, once things settle down a bit I am going to try and plan a get together to celebrate multiple things and events and friends. Hang in there with me!

Every Little Breath

This is Dwayne and super-murse, Erich, yesterday at MTMC. He was getting to walk around (to help get some strength) in that crazy outfit because they thought he had MRSA. Turns out he didn't but that is a whole 'nother story.

Saturday we stayed in and watched the Derby and avoided the storms. Dwayne wasn't feeling too well and was very hot to the touch. I pulled out my handy-dandy standby remedy of two equate aspirins, a vitamin, a vitamin "c" tablet, and some Gatorade. He took that and fell asleep on the couch. I also apparently fell asleep and when I woke up it was around 2:30 and I put us in the bed.

I wake up around 6 because Dwayne is making a crazy and scary noise. I look over and his eyes are wide open and his hands are in the air, fists clenched, and he looks like he is in terrible pain. It looked like someone who was being electrocuted and couldn't let go of the thing electrocuting them. I shook him thinking maybe he was having a bad dream. Shook him and said his name again. I then realized something was indeed wrong. I started screaming his name, dialed 911, and went to his side of the bed.

His arms were at his side and he was convulsing, he spit up and still his eyes were open. The 911 operator told me to stop screaming so she could hear me and dialed an EMS operator. I gave them the address in between sobs and took deep breaths like they told me to. Repeated things when I got too upset for them to understand me. I knew in my heart that when he stopped convulsing he would be dead. I was waiting for it. After all, we've all seen it in movies and on shows, the convulsing, the spitting up, and the sudden end.

Dwayne did stop convulsing but didn't stop breathing. Instead he sounded like an animal who had just run a long way and was in need of a break. I followed the EMS instructions and pinched the inside of his arm to get a reaction. His head just rolled around, eyes wide, pupils completely dilated, staring into space. I tried the sternum rub- I dug my knuckles into his chest as hard as I could but still no response. I could feel his heart through his chest and it was racing. I begged the EMS operator to please hurry and I hung on Dwayne's every breath.

The firemen arrived first and gave him oxygen and talked to him trying to get him to wake up. There were little sounds of waking and even at one point he sat up and did a double-take at all the people standing in our bedroom but still no connection between where he was and what had happened. The EMS arrived and they continued to talk to him and ask him questions and managed to squeeze the gurney back into our room and got him ready for transport.

"I need to get up because my back hurts," were the first words he said. The EMS tried to help him get up but his knees buckled. "Whoa," he said. They helped him back onto the bed and ended up sliding him onto the gurney over the foot board. As they pushed him out of the bedroom he looked at me with a concerned look and said, "It will be OK. Don't cry." Even though he had no idea what was making me cry or really what all this commotion was, he was comforting me.

In the ambulance they asked him if he knew where he was. "Murfreesboro." That's right but where specifically? "Foothills Dr." (His parents address.) As we drove to MTMC the paramedic told me he was in a postictal state and from all indications he had had a seizure. This confusion was normal and he would be alright in a few minutes. This did not comfort me.

In the ER Dwayne began coming closer and closer to normal. An I.V. here, a push of anti-seizure meds, crying parents, insurance forms, etc. He says he doesn't remember anything except waking up in the ambulance and wondering who this guy was asking him questions he didn't have answers to.

I was on the phone will 911 for a little over 8 minutes. He was in a full blown seizure for about 4 minutes of that and it took him about 20 minutes total to become cognizant of his surroundings. We spent Sunday and Monday night in the hospital and he was released today. CT scans of his abdomen and head are clear. MRI is clear. Blood/Urine testing clear. All indications are pointing to a perfect storm of very high fever, high blood pressure, and anxiety all caused by an undiagnosed sleep apnea. The theory is that his brain was starving at 6 a.m. Sunday and went into survival mode- sending out impulses to get the oxygen it needed.

He has some more tests to do in the next couple of weeks but is expected to make a full recovery. He is very weak and is not able to drive for the next 6 months. Luckily, my employer, his employer, and my professors have been extremely flexible, helpful, and understanding. So, we are on the road to recovery. In fact, he is asleep on the couch behind me right now and I'm here and I'm still hanging on every little breath.

Quickly....

Got a part-time summer job to keep me busy and bring in some cash while school is out.

Technically, it isn't out for about 2 weeks- FINALS TIME- perfect time for me to get a job, right?

Since I can never make things easy on myself here is an example of today's schedule:

Got off work at 11 p.m. last night
Homework/Study till 2 a.m.
Sleep from 2 a.m. till 7 a.m.
Homework/Shower/Leave for school at 8:30 a.m.
School from 9:10 a.m. till 1:00 p.m.
Making meatballs/Homework/Call Dell/Get ready for work/leave at 3:15
Work from 3:30 p.m. till Midnight

Oh yeah, another most awesome thing to happen was that the desktop we bought only 15 months ago has died. Hard-drive disk failure. So pissed.

Never mind the fact that I have all my speech proposals and junk on there....whatev! Luckily, we are still under warranty so we just have to squeeze in a time to meet with the tech and then we can have a working computer again. My laptop has really saved my ass right now. The only annoying thing is my printer is so old it won't work on it so I'm printing at the MTSU library.

Ack! Okay-gotta go- meatballs done, gotta eat, and pack tonight's work survival kit.
More later..... I think.

So. Amazing.

This is so amazing to me. I mean, I'm blown away by the clicky straws that come with the mini-tropicana o.j. boxes but this....... makes me kinda teary eyed.


http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/36232647/ns/health-health_care/

Sweet Revenge

Please, please, please click on the name of the blog and listen to this file.
I made a freaking podcast out of it...and to do that I had to look up how to do it, find a hosting site, and follow more crazy directions!
But if you listen to this... you will see why it was so worth it.

Remember that waxing I got?
Well the bastard who did the waxing got a taste of their own medicine!