My summer vacation so far.....

Nashville Shores sunburn on top of sunburn from the lake.

This is us, duh.

Ah, yes, the chosen ones.

7 reasons Grandpa Mills is proud.

That still doesn't look very sturdy.

I LOVE it!

Note to self

In other news......

I have been inspired by randomroxann and her old timey needlepoint attempt and have decided to learn the art of crochet. I have purchased all the accoutrement, including a book about crochet called (wait for it......) Stitch 'N Bitch Crochet: The Happy Hooker. How perfect is that? I have managed to perfect a slip knot and a simple chain stitch (um, O.K. so maybe I don't get the correct tension on every link....) and have taken aim at learning the single stitch. The single stitch is the base for every single crochet project and it is currently kicking my ass.

I have been placed on the waiting list for the Read to Succeed tutor program. Sad face. I can't start it until September when there is no possible way I can do it because my Fall classes will be in session. I have been contemplating trying to train on Saturdays in the Fall but really, how much can one Amanda do?

The yearly event that causes as much tension and worry as it does joy and fun has arrived. Well, 1/3 of it has. And that 1/3 is freaking HUGE.

Funniest thing I've read lately? " So you all can go to Hell, have fun there together! " (That was really the perfect line for your blog J. I am going to try and work that phrase into a conversation today. Loved it!)

Remember: I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!

Words of wisdom from The Raconteurs

"Many Shades of Black"

Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead
And smash it on the floor
Take whatever's left
And take it with you out the door...

See if I cry,
see if I shed a single sorry tear
I can't say that it's been that great
No, in fact it's been a wasted-free year

Everybody sees
And everyone agrees
That you and I are wrong
And it's been that way too long

Take it as it comes
and be thankful when it's done
There's so many ways to act
and there's many shades of black
There's so many shades of black
There's so many shades of black

Let it out (let it all out) let it all out
Say what's on your mind
You can kick and screamand shout and say things
That are so unkind.

Yeah,
See if I care
And see if I stand firm or if I fall
Cause in the back of my mind,
and on the tip of my tongue
is the answer to it all...

And everybody sees
And everyone agrees
That you and I are wrong
And it's been that way too long

Take it as it comesand be thankful when it's done
There's so many ways to act
and there's many shades of black,
There's so many shades of black,
Yeah, there's many shades of black

Yeah...Everybody sees
And everyone agrees
That you and I are wrong
And it's been that way too long

So take it as it comes
and be thankful when it's done
There's so many ways to act
and you cannot take it back
no you cannot take it back
there's so many shades of black,
There's so many shades of black,
Yeah, there's many shades of black
there's so many shades of black
there's so many shades of black
Yeah, there's many shades of black
there's so many shades of black
Yeah, there's many shades of black
there's so many shades of black

The battle continues.....

O-m-g.

I am a very socially flexible person. I can get along with almost anyone and can find fun in almost any situation.

BUT OMG.

Let me tell you a little story involving me and a not so nice lady. From this point on I'll be known as NFA (nice, flexible Amanda) and the evil lady will be known as ELIHVM (evil lady I hate very much).

NFA: ELIHVM, can you tell me when (certain yearly event) will happen?

ELIHVM: Oh, well, it will be between this date and this date because that is the ONLY time it can happen. I am just so busy and there are so many other things around this event. *exasperated sigh*

NFA: Ok, no problem. I will finalize things on this end. *Makes preliminary plans*

2 days later......

ELIHVM: We need to change the dates of this certain event! I have added more events to the schedule and we will need to shorten the time of our event and move it to these dates. Every second must be stuffed with events! All kinds of events and they are all so very important and can't be missed!

NFA: Ok, no problem. We have time to change things. *Reworks preliminary plans and makes new plans. Invests money and reworks schedule around the second set of dates*

1.5 weeks before the second set of dates......

ELIHVM: OOPS, I've misread something that really is important and so now the time should be EVEN shorter. Or perhaps you can just reschedule and readjust things on your end. My mistake. Golly gee, I just don't know what happened. *innocent smile*

End scene.

I imagine her has Godzilla crushing my village every time the phone rings. I really, really hate her with every ounce of my soul.

For the love of Slim Jims

I have always known that one of the things I love the most isn't good for me. Any edible item that has a main ingredient of "food-flavored solids" probably shouldn't be consumed EVER but it is so very tasty and comes in many interesting flavors. Who doesn't love a nacho flavored food-flavored solid every now and then? Today in North Carolina a terrible explosion occurred at a plant that produces the tasty "meat" sticks and it injured several workers and at this time 3 more workers are missing. Apparently the explosion was so large that it caused the roof to collapse in three different places in the plant. There is news footage of the plant in the aftermath and there are chemicals spewing from various pipes and smoke billowing from the fire that resulted from the explosion. I'm not sure if it was the Partially Hydrogenated Vegetable/Soybean/Cottonseed Oil, Xanthan Gum, Monosodium Glutamate, Trisodium Phosphate, or the Sodium Benzoate or some combination of those chemicals that caused this explosion (I imagine someone in a HAZMAT suit getting careless with the weapons grade beef fatty tissue) but it is something to think about. Something in my Slim Jims caused an EXPLOSION so powerful that a roof of a manufacturing plant to collapse. Gives a whole new meaning to "Snap into a Slim Jim" doesn't it?

To wax or not to wax

I got married in 2003. For a wedding present my husband gave me a "princess package" to a spa. I got a massage, pedicure, manicure, and my eyebrows waxed. It was wonderful and relaxing. The small Asian woman performing all my services was very nice but did puzzle me with something she asked. She asked me if I'd like to get my forearms waxed. I was confused and asked her to make sure I heard her correctly. She just smiled and asked again if I'd like my forearms waxed. I wasn't aware this was something people did and don't think I know anyone who does this. This situation came to mind recently and it started a great debate all over again. Have I been going my whole life with some sort of freakish forearm hair and not realized it? Did I miss that section of grooming class growing up? If I didn't have forearm hair would my life have been different? I am slightly tempted to get it done just for the experience of it all but am afraid that if I do my moderate hair situation might turn into a forearm hair catastrophe. Does it come back thicker? Will I turn into a modern day teen wolf? Will this start a never ending cycle of mandatory waxing that will cause me eventual financial ruin? These are troubling questions that need answers. I might take up my husband's suggestion and become an icon for a brave sector of people who do not wax and go forth proudly everyday with a shiny clean coat.

When I grow up I want to be.....

I was thinking about my life the other day and suddenly I was struck by the difference in what my childhood dreams were and where I actually am today. Not that there are not good, no, GREAT, things in my life because there are but it does make me wonder. I put together a list of things I wanted to be when I was younger and much more naive.

Teacher- I have been told many times in my life that I am bossy. There is actually a note from my 4th grade teacher on my report card that says "Amanda seems to want to run the class." I seem to be the person that people I work with come to for spell check and instructional tips on how to do things.

Fire Fighter- Did you know there is a specific group of fire fighters just for airport/airplane fires? They are not "regular" fire fighters (as if a fire fighter could be "regular") but they are specially trained for high heat intensity fires and airport security situations! I remember doing research on them and wanting to be the one to roll out onto the tarmac to help.

Marine Biologist- I love swimming and love the cool little creatures under the sea. The ocean holds so many secrets and has always had a mysterious pull on me. I wish there was a way to evaporate all the water for a short time with all the life in it frozen in a type of suspended animation so we could go and look and discover. Imagine taking a guided tour to the deepest part of the ocean, finding long lost wreckage, and discovering new species! Then after the tour just flip the switch and all the water is back and it is like it was.

FBI Criminal Profiler- I like to think I am in tune with a person's emotions and can get a general feel for someone. I often wonder what a person is thinking and what goes on in their head. The processes in the mind that lead a person to action are fascinating to me.

Journalist- I like to write and dabble here and there. That combined with my general nosiness made this seem like a natural fit for me.

Veterinarian- I love animals great and small. My first instinct upon seeing an animal is "I want to pet that!" I would love to have a house full of crazy and rare creatures. It would break my heart, though, to not be able to help.

What you don't see on that list is Customer Service Bitch. Which is what I am. How did I get from the list above to a cubical getting berated by a 75 year old woman who is unhappy about having to pay a Medicare deductible? Funny how life is and how life can change. Interesting to think on and a lesson learned that if/when I have children I will make sure to emphasize the importance of keeping dreams in the foreground because life is way too short to be someones bitch.